He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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